Peter Cavanaugh

President Poodle?

With Donald Trump’s poll performance suddenly plummeting in gallows drop free fall, should Mike “The Poodle” Pence start preparing for the presidency?

It’s no secret Trump’s recent stumbles following a wildly acclaimed Democratic convention have Republicans scrambling for an alternative option, however exotically conceived.

This might include resorting to curious language in the official party rules which state that “The Republican National Committee is hereby authorized and empowered to fill any and all vacancies which might occur by reason of death, declination or otherwise of the Republican candidate for President of the United States.“

Many suggest that “otherwise” is a weasel word intentionally inserted to cover unexpected contingencies that might arise during a campaign, in this case Trump’s ever more glaringly obvious unsuitability for office.

One scenario would see V.P. hopeful Mike Pence romp up to the top spot and have Poodle select his own running mate.

Acclaimed statistician Nate Silver projects that if the election was held today, Hillary Clinton now enjoys a staggering a 92.9% chance of becoming our 45th president vs. Trump’s 7.1%. Moreover, this represents an historic 50-point swing in just 10 days for Silver’s “Now-cast” projection. On July 27, Donald led Hillary 55.4% to 44.6%.

Swing states such as North Carolina, Pennsylvania, Virginia, Colorado, Ohio and Michigan are suddenly surging toward Secretary Clinton. Even Arizona, Georgia and Florida show significant motion in her favor.

We seem to be witnessing a cosmic convergence of historic proportion as a mountain of evidence piles up against Trump’s molehill mind.

Gold Star parents punished, a baby banished, Putin praised, Ryan rejected, an imaginary tarmac tale, a pathological inability to leave well enough alone - all of these things transpiring in less than a single week’s time. Mind-boggling? It’s Lucy and Ethel dipping those chocolates at Kramer’s Kandy Kitchen. You just can’t keep up.

And here’s a new one for you – possibly a Sierra Star exclusive.

Drawing upon my years in Rock & Roll Radio, did you know that Donald Trump’s official new campaign song - the one with which he closed his speech at the Convention and has been using ever since - is about picking up a hooker?

“There she stood in the street

Smiling from her head to her feet

I said "Hey, what is this?"

Now maybe she's in need of a kiss”

(All Right Now by the English rock band Free - 1970)

There’s a lot more. It gets even better. Go to Google.

Donald Trump was 24 years old in 1970, avoiding military service in Vietnam with his fifth draft deferment. Melania was born that same year on April 26.

Hillary Clinton was 23 in 1970, in her first semester at Harvard Law School. She had obtained a Bachelor of Arts degree the prior year from Wellesley College where she received a standing ovation lasting seven minutes for her commencement address. This was covered by Life magazine.

She then spent that summer working her way across Alaska, washing dishes in Mount McKinley National Park and sliming salmon at a fish-processing cannery in Valdez. The factory was shut down overnight after she complained about unhealthy conditions. Hillary was fired. And she’s often been treated unfairly to this day.

After Mrs. Clinton courageously faced a live, no holds barred interview with Chris Wallace on - of all places - FOX TV, the Washington Post unkindly presented her the following day with four “Pinocchios” - its highest score for flat-out fibbing. This judgment garnered immediate media coverage across the land - generally unquestioned by the press as though divinely documented.

I herein award the Washington Post with eight Pinocchios, 10 Jiminy Crickets and a giant J. Worthington Foulfellow the size of Donald Trump’s ego - all of which being granted for headline grabbing gratuitous malfeasance.

Come on.

The FBI verifies the fact that of the more than 30,000 emails reviewed during more than a full year of investigation, only 110 were finally judged by others after the fact as containing classified material, although not one was ever labeled as such on Hillary’s watch. This evidently bears emphatic repeating: “Not one was ever labeled as such.”

FBI Director James Comey specifically stated: “We did not find evidence sufficient to establish that she knew she was sending classified information.”

Comey went on record affirming that classified information was sent.

At the same time it’s been irrefutably established quite possible - if not highly probable - that Secretary Clinton truthfully didn’t know it at the time.

These are not mutually exclusive concepts other than to those irretrievably lost in the haze and horror of tragic self-delusion.

Such as Donald Trump and his poodle.