“It ain’t over till it’s over!” - Yogi Berra (1973)
“Super Tuesday” is now dangerously behind us.
This runaway train known as the 2016 Presidential Election Cycle is charging down the tracks with Donald J. Trump evidently all but done savaging Republican opponents, even as Hillary Clinton seems to be suddenly steamrolling over Bernie Sanders squishity-squish-squish.
Not so fast.
It’s all too crazy to not get crazier.
I find it impossible to believe that the Republican Party will allow itself to be terminally and permanently debased by a raging fool. Similarly, it may be unlikely that Hillary Clinton can gain the White House without continued opposition from disgruntled Sanders supporters led by militant millennials who just don’t buy her act.
What if Trump wins the Republican nomination and the party shatters in two with John Kasich as presidential nominee of a newly revitalized GOP under some other name? He appears to be the single current Trump competitor not completely unhinged and surely deserves growing recognition as “the only adult in the room” among debate participants.
The governor of Ohio brilliantly demonstrated that last Thursday night as Marco Rubio and Ted Cruz tag teamed against Trump in a heated match that reached epic proportions in an exchange of vile invectives and loutish language - in the process insulting the intelligence of any viewer over the age of 6.
On the Democratic side, forget any problems with “Benghazi.” Mrs. Clinton took care of that herself for eleven-and-a-half hours under oath last October, enduring vicious grilling before a Republican Select Committee dedicated to her destruction. But suppose Hillary ultimately faces federal charges of who knows what springing forth from that current “email investigation?”
Although highly unlikely, this could provide an immediate game changer, as would be any major negative revelation about the millions of dollars flowing into the Clinton Foundation during her tenure as secretary of state and/or her own “speaking fees” through the years.
Quick. Elizabeth Warren? Now you have no choice. Joe Biden? Get back in there. Oprah?
Then we have former Mayor of New York and multi-billionaire Michael Bloomberg waiting in the wings for someone to seriously falter. There’s always Scott Walker and Bobby Jindal wondering if they might not have given things up and pulled out too soon. That happens. And there’s even Mitt Romney, only days ago pathetically attempting to regain relevance by strangely and uncharacteristically tweeting wild allegations of a “bombshell” hiding in Donald Trump’s tax returns.
How about a four way race on Nov. 8? Donald Trump for President on the Republican ballot vs. Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton vs. John Kasich on a “We’re All Not That Nuts” ticket vs. Bernie Sanders as head of a new, insurgent “Let Me Be Even Clearer” movement.
Why stop there?
Let’s add Kim Kardashian and run her for queen, or have Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio joyfully join forces in an energetic “Co-Presidents Can Be Go-Presidents” campaign or watch Dr. Ben Carson sleeping to a win with his “I Can’t Believe No One Ever Notices I’m Always Stoned” Party?
Perhaps instead of Congress, we should have a Parliament with dozens of parties representing views of all hues?
Or have bare-knuckle fist fights on pay-per-view TV to pay down the debt and have the last two standing simply draw straws?
We’ll explore these options and even more this Saturday as the Oakhurst Democratic Club holds its March Meeting at Denny’s with breakfast at 8:30 a.m. and a program beginning at 9:30 featuring Public Information Officer Kaci Lutz of the California Highway Patrol. She’ll be speaking on “Cool New Things With The CHP.”
And it’s looking like a complete sell-out this Saturday night at Yosemite High School for the eighth annual “Nite on The Town” - the largest fundraiser of the year for the Yosemite High Music Department. With 100 students performing 30 memorable pieces, I will be assisting Oakhurst’s own Kent Byers in performing Master of Ceremonies duties and look forward to the “Nite” with great enthusiasm, and more than a slight measure of appropriate trepidation at being asked to take part in such a classy affair.