Peter Cavanaugh

Christmas questions

What’s next? How can things get stranger? Has our world become a giant lunatic asylum staffed by morons and run by inmates – the laughing stock of whatever intergalactic universe may or may not exist? But that’s harsh, the herald angels sing.

It’s holiday time, so let’s look at the bright side.

Donald Trump will never be president of the United States. Nor will Dr. Ben “Casually Catatonic” Carson. Nor Democratic candidate Martin O’Malley, whose name I can finally recall just in time to no longer have to. Bernie Sanders is still a long shot against Hillary, while Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio seem to be scooping up support from former Trump and Carson enthusiasts like elephant handlers in a circus.

The rest of the field is miserably moribund -- competing for the title: “Best Also Ran.”

I was listening to KFI AM 640 out of L.A. on Friday when news of the Planned Parenthood assault in Colorado Springs broke. The announcer, Tim Conway, Jr., instantly lamented, “Watch. Liberals will cite this is another example of gun violence and domestic terrorism.”

He was right. It is. Perhaps Tim was being facetious. While KFI offers relatively conservative programming, it is brilliantly staffed and Tim is dependably hilarious, as is his more famous father.

We just saw Vladimir Putin push his luck with President Recep Erdogan of Turkey, who promptly shot down a Russian jet when it crossed into Turkish air space for less than 20 seconds. Any serious retaliation by Russia could trigger a cataclysmic conflict. The United States is treaty bound to defend Turkey as a member of NATO, a deal becoming decidedly dicey.

Dr. Carson labels certain Syrian refugees as “rabid dogs,” then heads for the Middle East to hang out with a few.

Not to be outdone in inexplicable conduct, Donald Trump, ever plunging to new depths of decadent disgust, makes fun of a crippled New York Times reporter, finally claiming that the poor man is brazenly using the bloated bully for publicity.

In poll after poll, two-thirds of our fellow citizens consistently claim, “the country is heading in the wrong direction.” Similarly, an even stronger majority insists that Congress sucks and politicians can’t be trusted, so we need “outsiders” to run government.

All of this crazy talk comes from reputedly “average folks,” whining at the sidelines as though they have had absolutely nothing to do with failed expectations. Respondents either voted or didn’t vote in recent elections. Not voting is also a vote. Nothing comforts many of us like the soothing insulation of self-imposed ignorance.

Look out. Here comes Baby New Year 2016 in three short weeks. I want to yell - “Go back. Go back. It’s a trap.”

Yet irresistible optimism concludes this narrative. If nothing else, let’s enjoy the rest of good old 2015 and celebrate its pending retirement, wishing joy to the world and happiness to all.

On Saturday, I hope you will make plans to be on the scene for a major Oakhurst annual highlight as our Community Christmas Tree Lighting takes place at Road 426 and Highway 41, sponsored by Sierra Tel and hosted by Century 21 Ditton Reality and Victorian Village.

I’m informed there will be carol singing, pine cone decorating, a petting zoo, pony rides, and free hot cider, cocoa, cookies and hot dogs - all of which might more wisely be consumed by our little ones after they enjoy the bounce house.

Earlier in the day, our December meeting of the Oakhurst Democratic Club takes place at Denny’s with breakfast at 8:30 a.m., and a timely program at 9:30. Michael Baird, Administrator at Sierra Vista Presbyterian Church, will be discussing “Homeless for The Holidays” and providing updated information on our area homeless. There will be ample time provided for questions and you don’t have to be a democrat to attend. Or a presbyterian.

No one even checks.