Opinion Columns & Blogs

Don’t blame Phyllis

My wife and I returned from a radiation treatment in Fresno a couple of weeks ago and found two large, shiny new trash containers at the end of our driveway. With a few choice words and several groans I managed to leverage them into the back of the pickup. Up at the house, my wife and I managed to get them out of the truck and wheeled to a location out of sight. I removed the paperwork and headed to the house to not so quietly seethe at the new garbage collection demands.

I was somewhat prepared for this new service thanks to the article on the front page of the Sierra Star Sept. 10, but after reading the literature I was pretty much livid. How in blazes was I going to get the cans, loaded with trash and garbage down my driveway and then get them back up again? Neither my wife nor I are physically able to “take advantage” of this “service.” I could only hope that participation was voluntary.

I’ve written volumes of promotional advertising during my working career but “EMADCO will be enhancing your current collection service” made my blood boil. Now I am required to sort my trash and garbage to an extent far greater than the recycling I’ve been doing for years. My kitchen garbage receptacle will need a twin to hold “blue bin” stuff and all other waste baskets can’t take any tissue paper. And they call it an enhancement.

When I read “automated recycling and trash,” “no sorting” and “recycling will be easy” I was furious. This separating of garbage and trash was something done in Madera but now with the “enhanced and automated” service we, the payer of the bill, will be doing most of the dirty work for a “modest increase “ in service fees. As I fumed I wondered if this was EMADCO’s idea or had we been clobbered by our county supervisor. I was ready to find out.

I took a couple of days to cool off and then went to EMADCO’s office. I was greeted by a nice lady named Phyllis Myers. I asked her if the new program was voluntary and she politely said no. It was obvious that she had been verbally abused by others over this topic so I asked if this was their idea or should I call Tom Wheeler to stop by my place weekly to set out and take in my cans. That got a smile and the answer I should have figured out when I first got my new cans. There’s only one place in California that can make us do more work, pay more money and make it sound like Christmas: Sacramento.

Yes, none other than Governor Moonbeam and our other elected environmental wackos could force us to shovel manure, pay more, and tell us to be happy.

EMADCO has gone to considerable expense to comply with these new state regulations and they are to be commended and thanked for the fine service our community has appreciated for many years. Phyliss was most helpful helping me locate a device that attached to the cans and my pick-up so it will be relatively simple to take the cans down my driveway. I need to ask Tom Wheeler if the cost of that device is tax deductible.

Maybe we should send a tweet or twitter to Moonbeam to let him know there is a drought in California and we really don’t have the water to wash our garbage before we send it to him. Just don’t take it out on Phyllis.