Class is in session

In My Opinion

J.R. FroelichJune 14, 2012 

The elderly gentleman appeared at the high school administration office as if by magic. He was oddly dressed, with silver shoulder-length hair, old-fashioned spectacles and a kind, wrinkled old face. He introduced himself as America's Professor and asked the principal for permission to speak to the student body. Magic took control as the principal said, "I'll introduce you."

The American Professor told the students about the American Revolution. He described the oppressive regulations, irregular and punitive taxation, opinions of the monarchy signed into law, the bloody battles and thousands of lives lost. He described an eight-year war nearly lost. He told of 13 years crafting a constitution worthy of a nation founded on the principles of the Creator, a nation hungry for liberty and freedom to build its own future. A nation placed in the care of the Creator to whom they gave thanks.

Magic filled the stories of America's birth. He distributed a test and told them how blessed they were to have access to information undreamed of by prior generations. He said, "A new experiment in this nation strives to make everyone a winner. No more rich or poor, all effort is equal. The class average will be your grade." This thrilled the lazy students; didn't matter to the average students; and concerned "smart" students.

The test was taken, magically graded and returned. "As you can see," the American Professor said, "the class has received a B." Smart students were angry, average students were happy, and the lazy students were ecstatic.

The American Professor described 19th century America. "Your history," he said, "is your inheritance. You cannot separate your history from economics nor communication with your fellow man. To separate history from all other facets of life leaves you simply meandering through time."

Hours of information were revealed in seconds. "Did you know," he asked, "that gin played a part in the American Civil War?" This got everyone's attention. "It wasn't just about slavery or states rights. The introduction of the cotton gin had a major impact on the entire economy of the south. You cannot separate economics from history. Learn why there is war and you may learn how to avoid it. Wisdom dictates being prepared. America's spirit was tested and a merciful God saw us through. And now the test."

The test was taken, magically graded and returned. "You have all received a D" he said. The "smart" students had made no effort to support someone else's grade. The average student's average went down. The lazy students thought a D was OK.

"The 1900s tried America's very soul," the professor said. "World war, millions slaughtered, economic depression, and another world war challenging the freedom of all men. An economic boom followed lifting America above all nations. Your history in telecommunications, computer science, space exploration and yes, even the development of the gasoline engine and energy resources, is your history, your economics. Also, God died.

"In 1925, the Snopes Monkey Trial dictated that the theory of evolution would be taught in public schools. Our government took control of public education and quietly removed our Creator upon whom our nation was founded, replacing Him with a theory that mankind developed from a species without a soul. Time for the test."

The test was passed out, quickly completed, and magically graded. "You've all failed," he said. "How can this be," a lazy student shouted. "I was supposed to be raised up by the smart, industrious students!"

"You failed to understand the principles that brought forth this nation," the American Professor said. "The work of our government is to protect its citizens, not run their lives. Learn from your 16th president, Abraham Lincoln, who said: 'You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift, strengthen the weak by weakening the strong, help the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer, further brotherhood by encouraging class hatred, establish sound security on borrowed money, keep out of trouble by spending more than you earn, nor help men permanently by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves.' He also said, 'I and this nation should be on the Lord's side."

"Your history, your economics, your inheritance, is a nation born with the blessings of our Creator. No other nation on earth was founded on the recognition of our Creator, the giver of our rights. Learn this and by the grace of God you will succeed. Class dismissed."

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